I used to think love just was, but now I know love *does*.

If you haven’t gathered from my recent posts, I think I’ve been sick since October. 

But the kids have, too, so – as moms do – I’ve been taking care of them instead of myself. They’ve had countless doctor visits since school started, while I’ve been getting by on NyQuil, dry shampoo and what little uninterrupted sleep I can get on a toddler and a pilot’s schedule. 

But when things got real this week, and I came home from my appointment with an armful of pharmaceuticals, the ones I love stepped up in little ways that made a big difference. 

That means elderberry syrup made with love and sweet local honey from sweetest friends who are busy with their own kids and jobs and lives. Stopping by on a whim to play dollhouse with my girl so I can take a breath. Text messages offering dinner or babysitting. It’s friends who say, “I got you,” when you don’t got yourself. 

It means putting the big kids to bed early and taking the littlest one to bed with me, turning around from downing cough meds and filling water cups and locking doors to find the Christmas tree turned off. Watching as the baby emerges from behind it, throwing my arms around him in thanks, and heart almost bursting as he says, “you are most welcome.”  

It means my husband, who only has two days off this week, canceling everything he needs or wants to do to look up (on his own, without request) complicated recipes for Matzo Ball Soup, then going out to fetch all the ingredients and lovingly chopping everything by hand as he narrates from the kitchen step-by-step. 

I’ve learned what loves does is leap to action. 

When you’re young and foolish, love is a frenzy, a feeling, a fleeting thing. Then you grow up, and you live in it for a while. Soon your love gives you new little people to love – the kind who bring home the flu instead of flowers. And you realize … love isn’t piles of presents under the tree or words in a card or a diamond on your hand. None of that stuff is bad, but it’s still just stuff. 

Love is hands and feet. When things go south, it’s always your North Star. When people are sick or sad or hurting, you go and you do whatever you can to make them better. There’s a thousand little ways we can be there for each other every day. We just have to do them. 

When it really matters, love does.